I think drunk me is telling hungover me something... I just have to crack the code.
You have more facebook pictures than most towns have people.
Nothing says "This dudes gotta go" better than a boner on your back waking you @ 5 in the morning
I feel so grown up. I just went to home depot to buy actual home improvement supplies instead of stuff to make a bong with.
We shoved chex mix between her tits for her own survival.
I am nonfunctional stoned. I had to ask ben to put me somewhere away from all the people I'm sitting on someones bed watching a wall. Not alright. Should not have come.
halloween is the only time that anne boleyn, the joker, a cowgirl, and a mexican man complete with sombrero and poncho can all hit the same blunt
So idk if it's because I'm working out again or the coke, but I hit my target weight today. Whaaaat uuuup. Come and get me thanksgiving.
She was trying to drink out of the beer bong and she thought it didn't work. Little did she know there was no beer in there. Then she got mad at us. Girls.
at one point, i told him to buy you a pumpkin spice latte and uggs because you're a common white girl and that's how he should get you in bed
you guys have a strange definition of the word fun. I would have said dangerous, terrifying, or life-threatening. of course, bowling can now be described the same way.
Im gonna go for the gay guy. The ginger is freaking me out.
But I put cranberries and apples in my wine so it's festive drinking not suicidal drinking
You were out of control then you fell asleep on his lap for 30 min and woke up civil. Way to powernap to sobriety!
On a scale of having tea with Ghandi to the apocalypse how bad of an idea is it to drink with a 100 degree fever?
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