yeah I know. she is a stupid fat trailer trash bitchwhore and I hate her
but when she came up to me in the bar I had to be all like "OMG HEYYY how are you, I haven't seen you in foreverrrrr!!"
but for the record, yeah, I hope she gets mauled by a bear and dies
Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
If I can't get a one-legged man to love me, what the hell chance do I have with a NORMAL guy???
She started doing push ups and calling me a pussy. Never set me up with your ROTC friends again.
I can't get a boner in the bathroom of a buffet.
He took the lighter and said "this is how I give myself a bikini wax."
I now realize that they made gum to take the taste of dick out of your mouth.
I need you to send me a picture of your dick. I want to forward it to that girl and you and i both know you're more impressively sized
He is just a personification of a vodka hangover.
Yes. Sex with questionable women, and made of potatoes.
I kind of want to throw a lot of things at him. Mostly blunt, heavy objects.
I swear if he puts my hand anywhere near his dick tonight I'm "accidentally" leaving all my rings on
So many weird people in this class. I can practically taste their unwanted virginities. They taste bad.
Yeah, last night in the parking lot was hot. I'm sure whoever has the surveillance tapes thinks so too.
Make me food? I don't want to be a science experiment. I'm dunk. Holy shit. Drunk*. Let's do science.
at that point, I wouldn't blame you because I'd be so ashamed I couldnt even have sex with myself.
Randomize
