the best things in life are free. have that freshly fucked look and doing the walk of shame by HIS girlfriend.....priceless
Are you with Adam and his vodka?
Yeswdsssss I masde his pickle gi away ans he go anbnoued
know what turns me on? long, stringy hair on a pasty looking girl with an overstuffed backpack and kneepads over her jeans in case she falls off her scooter
your less of a man for seeing that
sometimes i wish i could find another girl that loves my dick as much as she does
i feel like she has dreams of it being like a person saying hey lets go play
It's cheaper then a lap dance and you get your hair cut.
Just so we're clear. I'm still making jello shots and bringing them to the bar in my purse. I don't care if its half off margaritas. Don't want anyone thirsty
He may only be 25% black, but after that sexual experience I am 100% never going back.
I made my own utility belt like Batman. It has a cup holder for my beer, cell phone holder, a little pocket for condoms, and a sewing kit just in case.
He just sent me a picture of himself naked while cooking pancakes and he made the caption "bitchin' in the kitchen"
I lost a whole day of my life. Apparemtly I was using my deodrant as a phone. And is my phone there?
The beer shits the day after completing the World Beer Tour at Epcot are just as epic as the tour itself.
I woke up with a bagel in my mouth, still ate it. Free breakfast
No like I actually peed on the treadmill. As it was running
For a second I thought I had fallen asleep on the floor and freaked out. Then I thought somehow I was on drugs. This is my life.
My concern for you and peanut butter is the reason I am still awake.
Randomize
