But if ***** wants to get filthy... Tell her to throw a text my way ;)
i jus pukd everywherw but i took a showr, come cuddle
bad idea #53- masterbating while on period.
i just noticed 4 flies in my red wine. i drank them.
if he only knew that in between each sext i was puking.
waking up outside has become so normal, the paper boy knows to set the paper next to me
they're like a gay fantastic four
She sat on the stairs and yelled sex positions at us. I don't remember if we went along with it but judging by the beer and condoms I'm thinking yes.
I woke up to find his roommate face down on the couch with no pants on, with a sticky note that said "was lost but now am found"
I would just like to point out that someone I had sex with drove me so I could have sex with you. I deserve some type of "most loyal booty call ever" award.
I just overheard this sorority girl saying "It's like trick or treting but for alcohol and with no costumes." I'm jealous.
Of all of my friend's husbands, I like when yours hits on me best
Awe that means so much to us
I cannot take an uber back in my costume...can you please come get me?
girls shouldnt black out with american flag bandaids on their nips
how is it I left wearing underwear then ended up with none? and why is it they are on you?
Randomize
