I'm afraid that if I tell my sister I think Zachary Quinto is gay I'll have to put her on suicide watch for the next week or so
have you facebook stalked him yet?
No, I don’t know his last name...
Just google his license plate numb
my mouth smells like i just ate out a crab.
dude, i was at the student union last night trying to study but some retarded sorority spent an hour voting on the color of the seasons shirts like it was a UN meeting- someone motioned purple, someone objected, and half an hour later after 2 recounts they decided on purple
hot pretzels for dinner, snacks, and now breakfast...oh to be a poor college student...everyday is like a carnival.
guess they didn't have any donuts in her size.
i like that you affectionately refer to him as "creepy" ever time you talk about him
He warned me he may piss the bed. I'm oddly okay with this.
Don't make this awkward for me. Don't let your mom come near the bathroom. I can't meet your mom for the first time while I'm shitting. Dont make this awkward.
No, I googled it. Apparently, male thongs are the next snuggy and a lot of guys love wearing them for the support.
I think that means you're growing up...when your coke nail becomes your opening mail nail.
I dealt with the imported moonshine, but when the cocaine came out, I had to get the fuck out of there
Uh, he still talks to you after you basically sexually harassed him using emojis?
we had a "who's sex playlist is better?" fight.....
You looked at the bouncer while you pissed on the front door of the bar and said...who the fuck are you?
Randomize
