Doing final review now. Then epic shit. Then going to take it. Should start it be 1030. Done by 2. Drunk by 3. Hammered by 4. Blacked out by 5. Streaking by 6. Jail sometime after that
I took off my clothes and she wanted to have sex. But then she changed her mind. So we ended up fucking through her panties or something. I don't know it was weird.
It was literally me in an evening gown and him in a tux with six bottles of Vodka at Jons.
And this was for your brother's Christening?
I AM OVULATING LIKE A STEAM ENGINE.
That dude you fucked three years ago just won Jeopardy
i broight you flpweers amd vodka. open yoir bask door
I think my staff loses a little bit of respect for me every time you're in town. I may have to puke at work ...again.
Just called my dad drunk from bed to ask for bacon.. my niece texted me when it was ready.. i'm never moving out
He's German, so by default he gets to fuck me.
I thought I was pretty much sober now but then I realized I've been eating scrambled eggs with my hands...
I mean, I would have, but I couldn't come up with a logical reason to bring up oral sex during an orientation.
How is it possible for someone who gets so many dick picks sent to her, to be experiencing such a complete and utter lack of dick IRL.
You took one look at him and said "let's hope I don't remember this tomorrow" then you took another shot and chased it with a beer.. I guess it was a success.
I am not walking across campus just to give you a blow job in the hopes that in return i can study more efficiently.
Wow I really just sharted up in this Kroger
Randomize
