I feel like I just won at life, no connection sex and free 12 pack of beer after. Does life give out trophies, if so I want a big one.
around noonish you got carried out for spitting water and throwing cups at old people...
Using manwich sauce as ketchup. Not bad. Love college.
I brought up my Bobbly Flay drinking game in the interview. Of course I got the job.
Hmmm just stalked him and according to his facebook he wants "whatever he can get." obviously he'd be open to the idea.
I don't think child baring hips is a compliment.
Do you think it'd be inappropriate to have an I'm Not Keeping My Baby Party the day after her baby shower?
He wasn't eating out, he was performing a hysterectomy without a license....should I be worried about my future family?
Don't you dare blame me for walking in one walking in on ur fuck session....u decided to fuck where we hid our booze
The only way I can describe the noise he makes when he has an orgasm: dying walrus.
It's just good to know that when I drink like a twenty year old I still act like one.
I just started the bonfire using a tampon. Who knew they could have multiple uses?
Wanna get mid day margaritas tomorrow if I'm still alive
All I know is I woke up cuddling a jar of peanut butter....
remind me again why we thought drinking hungarian moonshine was a good idea
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