i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
my brother is so whacked out on percocet from hurting his legs that he started crying because his belly button was so cute
I listened to the last 10 minutes of that 20 minute voicemail, it's solid gold. At one point he literally suggests we buy tasers and go around shooting people.
He made me a mix cd. There is obviously something wrong with him.
yeah, that's what i said too. right before i tackled that street sign.
So howd u manage to get high at a one year olds birthday anyway?
I rode on his Vespa around Florence and fucked him in an empty train. It was like a way sluttier version of Lizzy McGuire
I was puzzled last night that there were shots waiting for us when we got there. Just read my messages and saw you were ordering from the bar via texts.
We've been here for ten minutes. She told me I wasn't "Irish enough", licked my tits, and then sprinkled green glitter on them.
you really need to stop getting laid in my dreams more than i do.
He told me he wanted a penis beard so that he could look at girls faces when they gave him blowjobs. i have to say, i kind of admire his creativity
If I walk in on you beating off, at least have the fucking decency to STOP BEATING OFF!
according to last night, I underestimated the size of my mouth and the possibilities of what can fit into it.
We went to Olive Garden so high we didn't talk and managed to be awkward enough for the waiter to ask if it was our first date
My house is about to be spotless and the only person visiting is the plumber and not the porno kind.
Randomize