I love how girls just decide that guys who don't like them must be gay
I do the same thing. If a girl doesn't like me...I am like, "i must be gay"
So two questions...why am I covered in muffins and are there pictures of this.
I'm going to listen to christmas music to trick my body into cooling off.
also, I just found three random bruises on my knee. probably from when I was velcrod to the stairs
my heaven will be filled with hot naked men covered in chick-fil-a sauce and me wearing a bib
he fucked me so hard i could feel my pelvis shifting. like i legit feel more prepared for childirth now
"I'm in the bathroom. Only place I can sit and relax without that girl trying to give me a lap dance."
Fun Fact: I do not remember what its like to be sober between drinking off and on for two weeks at my "vacation" and being on painkillers for my mouth now
I found my weird threshold when Truth or Dare became everyone get naked and snort Adderall off the kitchen counter.
Just saw the ex while I was at CVS at 3am buying Depends for my heavy flow
I don't have time to shower before my passport photos...your cum is all over my hair...that's with me for 10 years now
Is there something wrong with us? Seriously.
Possibly, but I'd rather not fix it.
Honestly, the only reason I've been productive today was because I ended up organizing my apartment while searching for my vibratory charger.
Turns out my mom didn't really want to know I was in a new dimension last night from smoking so much.
I used to want you to marry him...Now I just think you deserve a bigger penis than that.
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