ive decided theres a fine line between accepting money for sex and letting someone buy you late night taco bell and knowing that if he hadnt you wouldnt be in his bed right now
I knew the sex would be bad when he slipped the rubber on and said "safe sex activated"
It's gotten to the point where NOT peeing in the sink feels strange and uncomfortable.
I got my parents high. They've been watching spongebob for six hours. You cannot tell me I'm not the favorite
Its like I was sleeping with a kid. His gum fell into my hair while sleeping and he just wanted to cuddle.
i crashed through a building. if that counts then yes, i went out with a bang.
she was eating donuts out of the garbage. enough said.
he had a Pillsbury dough boy tattoo to remind him of his drug dealing days
i'm not drunk or reckless enough to have you track my every fucking move. I AM AN ADULT
His birthday is on Valentines Day, of course he's getting a blowjob
Made him watch 4 hours of HGTV then told him I was too tired for sex.
Savage
now acid just makes me think of crab ragoon
Thanks for duct tapping my dick to my leg while I was passed out. I could only aim straight down. I stood on your bed. Have a nice day at work!
I just had sex with the kid I walked next to at my first holy communion
He kept saying "Ayyyyyyy" during foreplay... during sex.... during everything! It felt like I was having sex with friggin Fonzie from Happy Days!
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