Ummmm the art teacher neighbor asked me to pose nude for her art class for cash.
you told me to make out with him to promote the social success of the sorority
Horny girl and non horny girl have different views on life
I made him hve sex with me in the elevator so that I could put my finger down in never have I ever.
Truth be told I was googling "why is my left calf bigger than my right calf", porn would've been a better excuse for a virus.
He completely dissapeared at the baseball game. We found him passed out at the hotel three hours later with souviner photos of himself at the top of the Sears Tower.
Is your answer to that text seriously a right parenthesis
I'd rather take 10 virginities than catch something. Right now I should be good, I mean the sex with Jake was so bad he can't possibly have an std
At one point I yelled "THIS IS MY PENANCE FOR EVERYTHING I'VE DONE WRONG" and started saying Hail Marys
The guy that stalks me just looked out his window and saw me in his neighbor's hot tub. Get your shit ready the fraternity wars are starting.
MY TITS ARE PERFECTLY CALM.
Random pof guy just messaged me initiating a Pokemon battle. Want to be a bridesmaid?
anyways, do you want to make more embarrassing memories that im bound to remind you about later and laugh about?
Did we kick in my basement door last night?
Yes. I think you actually bought tennis shoes specifically for that application.
Did you just affectionately call me a scrotum?
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