Vegas for my brothers bachelor party. Just landed and I have a boner. I'm giggly and teary eyed I'm so excited.
We're 3 acts into this drag show and we've already run out of Lady Gaga songs.
I kept whispering "I love it when you call me big papa" until she got annoyed and left
Do you know how hard it is to get cum out of a straw hat!?
Bro, the freshmen are smoking in the park again, do you need ammo for ur paintball gun?
Dear slutty diary: I lied about feeling guilty of being a homewrecker in order to have more sex. it worked.
He made me brush his hair afterwards because it made him feel like a ken Barbie.
God I hope the sex was good.
Nothing says casual like stairwell bjs
Halloween: the only night of the year wheee the more high I get, the more it compliments my makeup and outfit.
AHHHHHHHHH. I LEFT A GLASS NEXT TO ME WHEN I FELL ASLEEP I'M SO SURE IT WAS WATER BUT NOW IT'S VODKA JESUS MADE A STOP
Nothing says Happy Holidays like sending a picture of your ass to the wrong manager.
Im just an angry damaged little elf who wanders around and tries to find drugs.
CAPS.LOCK.AND.SPACEBAR.ARE.BROKEN.
Why is there bacon in the couch?
Well, not only did I find out the Top Knight has roof access, I also let a guy I just met eat me out on the roof. Seems like a lot of wins if you ask me.
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