Last night this chick queefed when I was going down on her. Thinking if you! xo
they just came back. i guess "were gonna go get dinner" means "were gonna fuck for 5 minutes at the little league field"
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
I don't remember how we paid for the cab. I do however remember giving him my heels 2 help with the bill.
You better be watching. There will be a POP quiz. Each correct answer gains you 5 more minutes of the sexual act of your choice
its like fishing. just send her some cock shots to keep her on the hook then use tequila to reel her in
I just puked so hard I pissed myself. Outta my ass. I just won hangover of the century.
I usually don't buy birthday presents for my booty calls
But you'll make an exception
probably not
I mean honestly, I love naps like Anthony Weiner loves sending dick pics
I don't know what happened. His phone, shirt, shoes, and the condom wrapper are here but he isn't. I don't even know how to get a hold of him right now
It feels like I was drinking gasoline last night.
Well. Now I feel like I put pants on for nothing.
This drunk girl kept yelling for water so I dipped a cup in the toilet and gave it to her. She was thanking me all night.
You are cut off. Your giant penis and crazy awesome sex is ruining my body...
Nothing cures your heart after a boy calling you unattractive than a big fat dick
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