forecast for tonight- shitshow with a chance of tbell
my version of bright and sunny.
I got out of bed with her to go smoke a bowl with her roommate which was fine but I passed out when I went upstairs to take a piss.
Yeah.. she's probably not gonna call.
I've also decided that the true test of whether or not you should marry a girl is if she will willingly blow you while you eat Oreos.
Totally forgot Mike has only one ball. Is it sad I'm excited to see it? Or shall I say the lack of it?
I'm missing a sock, a boot, and antlers. We need to get on that.
Just discovered evidence of drunken eBay bid. Drunk Mike did pretty good -- I'm getting a new sleeping bag.
Chick in the reindeer getup puked on Baby Jesus last night. But then she bought us all empanadas so she's cool.
we had a "who's sex playlist is better?" fight.....
I'm rolling and just noticed that the thread count on these sheets is horrendous.
And I mean really who loses their phone in a tree
I honestly don't understand how your night went from singing a touching rendition of Africa to an angry political rant to low key trying to find a frat boy to bang to doing dishes to yoga
She said she was sorry for rolling around in her own vomit. Honestly, I thought it really added to the party.
That was the most spiritually awakened shit I have ever taken.
oh he pulled my dick out. wanna come over after he leaves
GET OFF YOUR PHONE
Also fucking you night and morning and then serving your parents breakfast is a bit awkward. And funny. To me.
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