Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me.
Well thats $24,000 well spent.
sometimes i wish i had a whole other life to spend on youtube
quitting drinking is the number 5 new years resolution but number 4 is enjoying life more which one do you think im going to pick
I just heard the term negative masterbation and I don't believe it
He passed out while I was riding him, and just when I was about to call it quits he opens his eyes and squeezes my boobs and goes Honk! Honk!
I love watching the kids I sold drugs to score touchdowns
Old woman told me I looked like her son and then she started explaining to me how she wanted me to fuck her
I also like to call Halloween "Mystery Fuck Day"
We were sitting in a hot tub debating how drunk we could get by osmosis if we kept spilling our drinks in it. This is what engineering college does to you.
Returning my drunken purchases from last night. Not a single thing I bought was on sale.
you were like "guys ... i think i got fingered while dancing tonight"
our poor poor cab driver
Also, I cannot stop picturing myself in a bar, 3 years from now ordering soda. Just soda. 30 pounds over weight and wearing a cat sweater. I feel like I'm heading in the wrong direction in life.
You kept trying to make cocktails with my protein powder last night...
That was the most spiritually awakened shit I have ever taken.
I swear he is my soulmate. He kept feeding me goldfish while we were fucking. Who wouldn't enjoy that while having sex.
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