Who haven't you slept with?
No one comes to mind.
my boyfriend just said he'd go down on me if I gave him my password to facebook
im starting to measure my showers by the number of beers i drink while im in there.
so I ended up banging her last night
dude I remember her. You sure it was a her?
i don't even remember
Don't worry we didnt bang. Sometimes I just bring guys home so I don't order pizza.
nothing says "you're fucked" like watching a movie with the family and a handle of vodka comes crashing down from your hiding spot in the ceiling tiles.
I am so hung over a medically induced coma is beginning to sound appealing.
Using our apartments online floor/space planner to see how many beer pong tables we can fit. Dont think they had this in mind when they put this thing online.
Probably not lol but were fitting as many as possible
When did we convert life to cartoon?
These are your "grown up" slampiece's new hours of operation; please plan accordingly
And fyi howling is not an acceptable form of communication.
I miss the days where our biggest worries were who was gonna win battle shits.
I need a costume for that party. Even if I'm just taking it off.
How do you explain to your kids that you met their mother well you were giving her a gynecological exam??
I just walked in on her masturbating to a social anxiety video...
Randomize
