I know its small, but please -- stop calling it my "weenis".
I'm taking child development now so if you get pregnant i can raise your child no worries
So my teacher figured out I made a drinking game out of her lecture. Once my drink was gone she let us out. Happy St. Patricks day class. Your welcome
What baked good do you think says thanks for being a great tutor, lets bang?
Peeing in public by noon, this is not a good indicator for the day.
I guess I was trying to make a cheese sandwich, I had to change my sheets cuz I slept on it and the cheese melted all over me, Dave, and my bed
I can't say "baby i'm to high to talk to you" in Starbucks.
I like her. She smells like old lady but tastes like whiskey
You can achieve whatever you wish in your imagination with some help from drugs
Pretty sure I just noped a member of the Canadian women's hockey team on Tinder.
Just realized I chose a bacon cheeseburger over sex last night
Maybe whip a sausage around while you do it and pour some beer on you. Like a German white snake video
I just googled, "what type of cured meat does my face taste like", and one of the top results was, "The Definitive Guide to Bacon." I couldn't make this up if I tried.
I am still worried she'll have a seizure durring. What would I do? Try to ride it out and finish, or pull out and assist?
it was like 6 shots in and he was automatically my type
Randomize
