i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
When we started taking double shots of vodka and chasing it with a lick of fruit roll-ups, I knew there'd be hell to pay in the morning.
There's cake. And donuts. And strippers. It's like 5 year old me and 20 year old me are throwing a party together...
You know your in for a great weekend when you buy the booze already in crutches
Well if he truly loves me he will just have to accept my flaws. And that includes a tequila dependency and borderline lesbianism.
Dude, she sent me a nude of her posing in the mirror and her dad was in the reflection
I think this girl gave me a handjob thinking that I would help her with her cell phone bill
omg. that's awesome
I feel like when purchasing hard liquor on a Monday I also need to buy a happy 21st bday card to not seem so pathetic
Just made a drunk dude do 20 push-ups. In the parking lot of the bar tonight for a keystone light I found in the back of my truck.
Oh yum
EMERGENCY FRIEND CRISIS: WE HAVE TOO MUCH WHISKEY. ABORT HANGING OUT WITH MELISSA, RECOMMEND TO HANG OUT WITH OUR WHISKEY INSTEAD
I knew there was a problem when things got heated and instead of rushing home I offered to get bagels instead
Why is it I can't go buy redbull and tylenol pm from a store without getting questions about my health choices?
this potential sugar daddy just sent me a photo of him butt naked in the woods saying he wants to "grow our spirits together." so i think i found us a new drug dealer!
It seems that Coffee is the true alpha male.
Well I'm back. Could you fill me in on what I missed?
You don't want to know. Trust me.
Randomize