Hope the move went well! I'll miss you!
you are a cunt and I hated living with you and your skeezy boyfriend.Just thought I'd get that out there.
Im handcuffed to some kid i hardly know. there are no cops involved
sometimes i wish i could find another girl that loves my dick as much as she does
i feel like she has dreams of it being like a person saying hey lets go play
you need to not memorize your credit card number for drunk pizza
You said, "can you make out with him for a little bit, I need a break."
Although last time you were unsure about someone they flipped a golf cart on me.
Ordered a large pizza and definitely just paid the cab driver in pizza slices. I'm glad there's someone out there that's just as fat at heart as we are.
Just caught my first cougar this fake was worth every fucking penny.
Which is worse rug burn on your nipples or laying there after wondering how long you have to cuddle before you can sneak away?
How hard to you think I will be judged if I order 8 giant pickles from Jimmy Johns right now?
the guy I've been trying to get with saw my brother's genitals before he saw mine, so that's my life.
so like what it comes down to is do I wanna look like a boss ass bitch or do I wanna masturbate.
A dick pic is not a proper way to say I'm sorry
This is like 50 shades on steroids but with healthy relationship models and mutual respect among all parties involved and lesbian activity.
Hey what you doing tonight?
Working at the hospital! So hurt yourself and come visit :)
See you in about a hour
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