great sex! but now the fight over who sleeps on the wet spot starts.
waiting in line for my ID. the kid in front of me reaks of hopes and dreams and hornyness-- freshmen by calvin klein
i just got fired from my job because i was "too smart" and my immedate response was i am WAY too stoned to be considered smart, and theni walked out the door.
wow. i have no words.
what made it akward was his girlfriends dog watching us have sex
The online application for Mcdonald's said I could do incredible things there. Today I threw out shit filled underwear in the women's restroom and escorted a very drunk/high 42 year old man outside after he ordered a 5 dollar foot long and a bloody mary.
almost passed out on the way to class today.. laid down in a construction site. bad idea
I just asked the contractor building my house what it would cost to put a garbage disposal in all the shower drains...there was a lot of judging going on.
you know it takes a lot for me to use utensils conservatively
I'm also 3/4 on the frats. Its like my goal of traveling to all 7 continents, but different somehow and a lot less morally sound.
this weekend destroyed me...my brain feels like the curly fry at the bottom of the bag. GAhhh come save me
that's ecstasy for ya. now I'm kinda in the mood for jack in the box.
You are mentally unprepared to be exposed to my degree of perversion.
You screamed 'no, YOU put some pants on' at a cop. I pretended not to know you.
I just got a text giving me an hour window for when my vibrator is gonna be delivered. If that's not awesome customer service, I don't know what is.
I can't believe the police had to bring me to my booty call last night
My neck is sore from all the headbanging. And I can't tell the difference between the jello stains and cum stains.
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