I like you better when you drink
I like you better when I drink too
this text is just filler to avoid a lull in the conversation
this kid in class is playing minesweeper and just slammed the desk because he lost. thank god were normal.
I saw a girl walking around campus with bandages on both her knees. I need to get her number.
A relator touring our house this week saw the picture in our bathroom of steven passed out, yellow faced, with BALLS on his forehead, and had to ask "if that kid was alive or dead".
you just kept yelling NO BUENO SENOR at the cashier and throwing coins at him, of course you were going to get kicked out of the grocery store
the point of no return was when you "drugged" his drink with glitter. face-planting on his dick was beyond.
Just got a picture message from my sister of the two of us wearing cowboy hats and pressing our bare asses together. Do you remember enough to explain?
Sign out of Gchat. Right now my gchat list is entirely girls I've slept with.. and you. You are fucking up my gchat chi.
If I'm going to start compromising my butthole it's going to be for much better drugs than a ventolin
I just want to like rub my face on his abs
I need help
honestly dont worry about it, its not the first time ive injured myself on a potted cactus during sexual relations with a woman
Seriously, why do I have a mortar round?
I feel kind of like we’re in a gang and tonight is one of those “people are gonna know not to fuck with us” type of nights. And then tomorrow I am going to learn to pole dance. I’m not really sure how I got to this point in my life… but I like it.
It's OK, I woke up in a drag queen's bed last weekend. It took me forever to get the glitter out of my cleavage.
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