Please stop trying to convince people that you're retarded and I suck your dick in the same conversation.
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
You said you wanted to go to louisiana and get arrested by Steven segal
he told me he expects me to keep the fangs on when i go down on him. presumptuous, yes, but man after my own heart.
I think he just gave me the 'I used to sleep with your sister' discount
He was dressed as ron burgundy and his pickup line was "dont worry, i wont make you jump in a bear pit."
Just peed in a urinal with another girl. It's that kind of night.
Omg no. We ate a raw pumpkin last nighr. We dipped it in BBQ sauce.
You texted me a picture of your face along with #help
Well I'm in the bathtub smoking a bowl and eating doritos and frosting so I might not be the one to advise you on this shit but I'll try.
So the dog chewed my vibrator last night. It added a nice new texture actually.
Just walked by a girl saying to her friend "honestly you coulda given me any dude and I woulda fucked him"
You should've introduced yourself
SHE POOPED THE CONDOM WHOLE
Just watched someone fail a field sobriety test. Miserably. At 4:50p. I think it's my future husband
God bless him
Ya can’t just go throwing accusations around about someone pooping their pants without some hard evidence
Randomize
