Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
I got a 69.7 in accounting. I have this whole doing the bare minimum down to a science
he drank a monster margarita at dinner. had to ask me if it was dollars or minutes that ended in 60.
george bush was a better president for first pitches than barack obama. there. i said it.
Oh my god! She wrote the word ''hi'' in HAIR on the shower wall. What the fuck?!
Did you ever stop and think that god invented whiskey dick specifically for me
I AM THE KING OF THE FRESHMEN
how did i know this would happen?
puking in a sink with a garbage disposal Fucking. Rules. It's like you're punishing your puke when you're done.
I snorted a few ambien and woke up here. A lady banged on our door, waking us up, demanding our towels.
Based on the grey fur I pulled from my teeth, I think her vagina has mice.
Cant really say how it happened but i woke up in the middle of the night and somehow pissed all over connors dad
I'm not into beards but apparently my vagina is.
I just found out that there's a bar that has happy hour at 12 pm. It's like the universe doesn't want me to be sober
tinder day one and i already had more guys message me about "the girl with the big tits in my second picture" than about me. MY 17 YEAR OLD SISTER CAN GET LAID WITHOUT EVEN HAVING TO MAKING A PROFILE
to be fair she does have a great rack
he's been 21 for 38 minutes and he's already trying to fist fight this dude over his girl
awwwww babys first drunken mistake
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