I wanna wear you like a flannel shirt
Omg just saw this kid I went to elementary school with at the bar and he used to be cool and I was so awkward but now I have boobs so I WIN.
I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
Any girl that compares her vag to a hot ham sandwich is beyond a slut
i dont care if i had to wear a dress to fuck her, she was super hot and i stand by my decision
Every day I regret the life decisions that led me to bank management and NOT being a coke addicted stripper. Every. Single. Day.
I can get orange kush...
GET IT NOW! WHY IS THERE A DOT DOT DOT?!
I need a pic of your cock for our cock collage
We tried the hang n bang, remember? You ruined it by crying and telling me you loved me while blowing me.
"YOU ALWAYS BEEN A HOE YOU ALWAYS GONE BE A HOE. THAT'S JUST THE WAY IT'S GONE BE." overheard at temple
we both turned hook ups into relationships we are crushing this thing called life right now.
At one point I was convinced he was a snake and was going to eat me And I just accepted it
I was gonna be Romantic and write your name in emoji eggplants but A's are hard
Dude we just exchanged Zelda related pickup lines. I fell in love at "you can blow on my ocarina"
You think I could convince him that having sex with another girl isn't cheating?
Randomize
