I know she is the girl of my dreams bc she orgasmed, rolled over and then asked if I knew that Orlando beat Cleveland.
she fell down the flight of stairs and was fine until she saw the two broken beer bottles on the ground by her.
thats a woman
So i decided to deal with the awkwardness of last night by making out with all three of them
I had to remind him that there is no "age exchange rate" between the u.s. and spain, and that 16 will always equal 16
...there is blood under my fingernails.
...I hope my roomates are okay.
I give him blow jobs while he watches sports.. how am I not his gf yet??
normally i'm against accepting campers on facebook but this one saw me giving head to another counselor and didn't say shit about it to my boss so i feel like shes earned the right to look at my sloppy drunk pictures
she told me i tasted like america
well you decided to make everyone "drinks" which was sprite and beer mixed.
Noooo. We thought it would be funny for him to wake up buried in the sand. But we just remembered about the whole high tide thing and it's dark and it's pretty damn hard to find an unconscious head sticking out of the sand. Just help us out
He told me since I'm into organics I should know his meat is known locally for its quality and hes hand raised it since age 13.
I'm hiding her cosmo magazine. the only sex tip she needs is to not handcuff her boyfriend to her roommates bed and lose the key
Remember when I peed in the trash can in the ATM room last night?
Never thought I'd say this, but thank god for my blackouts.
The highlight of the night was when he yelled "WAS THIS CONDOM MADE FOR TODDLERS??"
did you know that sneaking into a golf course at midnight is a felony? the cop made sure to tell us after she peed on the course and hit on him
Randomize
