she was so ugly that the sight of her made me shiver and then i had to play it off like a draft blew by that only i felt.
Yeah. We was talkin. Its ok. My bed is too filled with pam for sex. Its like a slip and slide of butter product.
I spent an hour trying to convert bar outfits to church outfits. Its hard.
Her mom caught her drunk streaking when she was 12. Of course she's perfect for me.
shattered his nose in 8 pieces. Blaming it on the dog. I feel more guilty about ruining the dog's good name than I do about ruining his nose.
I'm more concerned about the fact that I can't feel my gums
Can you explain to me how i got kicked out of a bar last night, from outside the bar?
and then you looked me right in the eyes and said "i just really wanna pet some horses right now"
Wearing the flip cup varsity team sweatshirt was the best descision of my life.
Must say, as a couple, she and I are thrilled that our pretend lesbianism has paid off.
Aka reading hardcore gay robot porn as a steady trickle of elementary schoolers walk by me every so often and im still in uniform as there councilor
Who is also still dressed up as a pirate
I tried to take home a cat on broadway last night. I named him Pinocchio and put my purse down on the sidewalk and tried to put it inside it
Just want to let you know thanks for setting the bar pretty low when it comes to girls.
Also this guy in my contact as hairy jerry sent me a pic of him shirtless and said I miss you and I have no idea who he is /when or if I met him but that's not normal?!
He just stopped me mid blow job so he could text his wife asking for TacoBell.
Randomize
