Well douche your snatch and let's go!
She told me she only masterbates to Kenny Rogers songs.
OMG. What did u say?
I told her I did too.
I just caught myself dancing like an old lady in the shower. Have I reached the age where booty dancing stops and swaying of the upper body begins?
This is how scared I get when I ride roller coasters. And how scared I was when I had to poop when I had herpes.
If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
I need to stop researching the drugs I do on Wikipedia. The parts about abuse and dependency hit too close to home
i regret nothing . he quoted dr. suess . he deserved that bj .
I just put fruit snacks in my sangria instead of real fruit. Its like freshman year all over again..
We couldn't afford sangria freshman year. We're lucky we had fruit snacks..
How do you leave a condom wrapper under my mom's pillow...
This may not be the best moment to laugh, but I am.
for me, it's working out the tricky timing of the Viagra and nightly laxative.
Just watched two people have sex in the pool. Hope you enjoy your yeast infection courtesy of the comfort inn.
I feel like too many of my sentences start of with "Hey, fuckface!"
now acid just makes me think of crab ragoon
I am at a cat party and I just witnessed people lapping vodka out of a bowl for a contest. Lol
No I didn't say it was safe, I said it was legal. I didn't say anything about it being safe. It's not my fault if you weren't listening properly.
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