I justed realized that the word 'turd" is present in saturday
Lady next to me is getting american flags airburshed on her nails. god bless the ghetto.
did i really try to jack off an athens police horse last night? please tell me youre kidding..
standing in line at subway, they've got 'stand up and get crunk' blaring. the lines out the door and everyone is dancing. Lombardi Gras rules.
I feel like I'm sitting in a sleigh of puddy. It's not a bathtub though because you need a sleigh to go down a mountain.
all I remember is repeatedly winking at the fire marshall while he was counting the people in the bar
Seriously this night has "go home now before you cry, puke or scream on someone" written all over it.
ATTN: We are officially 15 weeks from our annual "Get-Mega-Stoned-and-BBQ" event. Start saving up the proper supplies. That is all.
It was insane. I was drunk for 11 consecutive hours. I woke up covered in almonds and there were footprints all over my shirt
And that's the fourth pair of yoga pants with unwashable stains from you.
I kinda feel like I was hit by a Prius. Just glad it's not bus status.
When she tells her friend, "hey I'll be back tomorrow, just going to fuck a guy", right in front of you, you know you've got a winner.
Who's the naked guy asleep in your car?
Come camping we have xanax and steaks
I haven't felt more like a college student than when I woke up this morning naked with my sociology textbook in front of me and my bong in my left hand.
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