I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
I hope you never procreate. Philly is already the ugliest city in the country.
ya i vaguely remember microwaving a whole package of bacon for 20 minutes or so and then eating it all around 4am
I don't remember. I think I elluded to the fact that I would buy him a dildo for his birthday.
She won't let me open the car door while we are on the highway so I can throw up outside. She deserves to have her car thrown up in.
I never want to hear the words unlimited shots for boobs in the same sentence ever again.
Are you high right now?
is that a question or a drake reference?
I told my doctor about us having twin chlamydia
I WILL PAPERCUT YOUR URETHRA YOU DO NOT STEAL A MANS SECOND BIG MAC
That's what every 12 year old basketball team needs; a drunk and hungover lady eating KD whilst cheering them on. Highlight of their lives.
I have the rest of my life to settle down this is totally time for friends and pizza
The impromptu 'dance party' was just three white dudes flailing arrhythmically in the kitchen in absolute silence. Stone cold sober.
For someone who wanted a break I'm getting way to much dick
I really need to get to the point where I can poop at his house. I’ve taken three shits on the way home already.
The fact that you cheered yourself on while you puked saying it was your first college puke, blacked out, and sang taylor swift to the toilet confirms the fact that we are related. I've never been more proud.
Randomize
