The bars here don't close until 4!
my legs don't close until 4
Just saw the hottest 4 garbage men ever. They should make a calendar
good news. it is gonna rain tomorrow so now I don't have to pay to clean the puke off the side of your car.
At the wedding. Seated next to the bar. No way this ends well
Let's get back to talking about you giving me a blow job.
I bet you think you're really funny for switching my line of coke with a line of protein powder.
I have a meeting at work in an hour, I'm so hungover going outside is NOT happening there are roads and shit I'll totally get myself killed.
Come down. Bring Jorts. We're getting ready for this tricycle race like champions.
Just watched a drunk girl hand her valet ticket to a cop and walk away.
Okay so my USC tutor just offered to eat me out. I think I'm definitely applying to USC.
Whiskey dick has taught us to be smart with our time.
stop sending me battleship coordinates and get back here so i can suck your dick
Well I've made a drinking game out of the Wiggles but I think I've got this babysitting thing down
i asked your drunk ass where the fuck you were going and you screamed “WENDY’S BITCH”.
so you might not believe this but he made a powerpoint. and gave you a 3.5/10.
Randomize
