I am at the gas station and there is a whole amish family here I'm not sure why the amish need gas but I think its worth investigating
everyone contributed. i held her hair back, he rubbed my vag... it was a team effort.
And a psychic told me I was pregnant and I am just so over life right now.
Got into the physics lab with my student id, hooked up over break when school was closed. I regret no payments for tuition.
His roommates came in and started a dance party in his room while we were having sex. He said it wasnt the first time.
First table when you walk in. Can't miss us. I'm wearing a feather boa and a green hat
You had me at first table
That's the kind of activity you can only get away with by wearing a lion codpiece
some kid lit a j in the bar tonight. i was in awe of both his boldness and the severe beatdown he received moments later
all I've ever wanted was a guy with twelve cats who will tie me up in bed
Never in my life did I think i would give a blow job in the bathroom of my old elementary school. Twice.
Hey before you quit, let me sell drugs to your boss at least one more time
I woke up this morning to find my closet lacking 98% of my clothes and a text from my male roommate saying your dresses squeeze my genitals
The squirrels were at the front door. Dude I swear..
I'll be coming off of 7 days of not drinking. No horse tranqs either. I haven't been this sober since I was in the womb
It actually wasn't the first time that a guy I just met ate me out in the back seat of his car in a starbucks parking lot in the middle of the day.
Randomize
