hipster in red sally jessy raphael glasses inside. kick her.
I'm not saying he was bad at sex, but I'm pretty sure I anti-climaxed.
When she can manipulate the direction of her leg hair, you know its time to leave
if you hear someone banging on your door early in the morning, it's me with some breakfast burritos, so don't be alarmed
What's the over under on catching something from your sister?
We talk about tequila and blow jobs the way that normal people talk about the news and the weather.
I dunno. The only plans I have for sure after finals are smoking a bowl and eating a 5 pound gummy bear. btw I bought a 5 pound gummy bear
Any chance you used one if the curtain rods in the fireplace room as a sword? One is missing
But that background check said 51...Omg. If I hooked up with someone that's my dads age.....
as your best friend, I hope we never outgrow 'I Just Got Laid' texts
I have never thoroughly inspected the geometry of my nipples until now. How do I fix this?
I can't believe he's mad at you for not remembering your fake anniversary.
I'm surprised this is your first encounter with pepper spray. surprised, and somewhat proud.
I'd like to thank Vicodin for getting me through family thanksgiving once again.
Me and dad were just reflecting on that time he found a gas mask bong in the backyard.
Randomize