The pirates hijacked 3 more ships today!!
we need a boat to join in
Obama is on top of it we'd get killed within mins, but we'd live in legend foreva
very cute, but more "I wanna put you in my pocket and keep you as a pet" and less "please bang me" type of cute.
so i was pissing and the phone rang but i forgot i was pissing so i just ran to answer the phone. it was too late when i realized
i walked into his room and he was eskimo kissing his weed..
What happened to "I wouldnt even touch her with a ten foot pole"?
Her vagina devoured it.
You're a college freshman. Its your job to be pathetic. And drunk. But mostly pathetic
Just start grabbing cocks. It can't go wrong! Just say you thought you knew him and wanted to check.
We're pregaming our midterms. Also, when we get our tests back, we're taking a shot for every point we lost. If you're not in, you should just go ahead and transfer.
Her stripper name is Geico. I'm not drunk or creative enough to make this up.
This is the I'm sorry text for running around yelling don't shit on my rainbow, end up in the fetal position crying at 4 am in my car because someone shit on my rainbow
please remind me of this if i ever start out a night declaring my goal is to see how much american honey it takes for me to forget who i am again
Like you can't just be like oh bb and THEN SEND ME A FUCKING PICTURE OF MY 8TH GRADE FAT SELF IN A TACO COSTUME
Okay so the couple who keep propositioning people for threeways are def siblings not bf/gf
So are you gonna do it or no you said they're hot
Clothing is a burden necessitated by propriety.
Finally got with the virgin.
Yeah? Howd that go?
As soon as I got it all the way in, I looked deep into her eyes and said "your soul is mine" in the deepest voice I could make. She was not amused.
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