Joe is yelling at the trees again.
her vagina probably looks like a grenade went off in a deli
That's what happens when you park you car under a perfectly good balchony I can puke off of
Yeah, half my ass was burnt and I was missing a shoe. I'm blaming you for the shoe.
Do you remember snorting allspice and yelling at doughnut shop girl?
Couldn't find any balloons, so we're doing whippets out of condoms. Being a ho has its benefits.
i'm soo broke, the only trip i can afford for spring break is acid
Like an undercooked grilled cheese that got cold again. But hairy.
And there goes my desire for sandwiches. Forever.
It's time to run my sex life like a basketball team. Got the lesson Clint!
Spending Thanksgiving making a swinging profile brings the day to a whole new level...
So hungover and decided to eat a burrito and a pot brownie for dinner, this is what adulthood looks like.
I'm just drunk enough to be eating egg rolls on the toilet
I feel like my toilet water looks different when outsiders use my bathroom...
Are you high right now?
HOW DID YOU KNOW!
A true gentleman never tells. But yes, I did indeed get laid last night
You can't just bring up bondage and then stop answering me
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