This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
Just put a picture of dead dolphins on her wall...told her the oil spill was her fault.
If I was there, I'd make you a vicodin spiked sandwich.
Sorry for walking in on you guys last night. FYI I have a bruise on my forehead from having the door slammed in my face. I deserved it.
I have so much shit FLYING through my head. They're all in magic carpets and everything
Pretty sure I sang "What Makes You Beautiful" to some random guy in a parking lot last night...
How do you tell an ex that banging less hot chicks than me is highly insulting? I almost want to try and get him laid with a pretty girl just to save some face for dating him so long.
I GOOGLED IT. BEES CAN MASTURBATE. WHAT.
you stole two subs and a drink from jimmy johns and walked out yelling "get at me bitches"
I got my first tattoo & injured myself while having sex in a national monument. I say we consider this weekend siezed.
Also, lets remember that we have known each other for nearly a decade and our two most recent photos to one another are boxes of plan b
You don't know how skeptical I was about letting a guy with braces go down on me
One of my life goals was never to see an uncircumcised dick. I guess that's out the window now.
She said I'm like warm bathroom-sink water. There's nothing necessarily wrong with me, but she doesn't exactly want to "drink me in"
If you could not mention to him that I slept with his best friend, that'd be cool of you.
Randomize