there's a lady drinking out of a red cup in class. HAPPY FRIDAY
You covered in salsa con queso would take care of all of my cravings right now
We just built a bong out of a pineapple. I am never leaving hawaii. Ever.
i dont care if i have to wear a pillow case, there will be an open bar at my wedding
all i seem to do anymore is lay around stoned, naked and eating mangoes
I can't wait for you to see these terrible photos I'm about to have taken with some stripper looking girls. I don't know what this photographer is thinking
Never use fire and ice condoms with a dude who always claims he "didn't know it was the wrong hole"
Well, somebody (me) put on reindeer antlers, crawled around on the floor, and meowed at people... So yeah, I'd say it was "one of those nights"
Think of something healthy and responsible. Now think of the exact opposite, let's do the latter
I'm just saying; the box truck will cost less then dorms or rent, and we can always crash where the party is.
I just realized I wasn't at the party anymore. I was just sitting there with a vacuum.
NO I WILL NOT SET YOU UP WITH MY TWIN WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH YOU?!? JUST BECAUSE I WONT BLOW YOU DOESNT MEAN YOU CAN STALK HER AS A BACKUP PLAN YOU SPANISH BASTARD
Well just saw that professor I hooked up with on campus and I look like a dumpster baby
Acid king. Jackson puked a lot. Promoter booth. Angry security. No acid. Probably a good thing.
Honestly, if you don't have a lawsuit pending against you by this time tomorrow, I'll be impressed.
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