she just asked me to help her create a twitter page for edward cullen's hair.... seriously.
I can't wait to get all this Makers out of my shoe.
I've taken to hiding pictures of us around his room so that he'll forever feel guilty for dumping me on Valentine's Day... And to potentially cock block any hook ups.
This is going to be the summer remembered forever as the giant 3 month long mushroom trip.
So ive narrowed my options down to getting food or masturbating. Don't judge me
Have bite marks on my arm where my temporary tat was Saturday night. Did someone try to bite Captain America or something?
One of the many mysteries surrounding the weekend...
she's an english major so her sexts are something i look forward to
We're like adult pinky and the brain when they decided that taking over the world is unrealistic so they aim lower by trying to get drunk every day.
I can feel your movements against the shared wall we are leaning up against. It makes me feel as though we are one. Queue Pocahontas song...
Guys always stop talking to me right around the point that if they bought me food a couple times I would probably have sex with them.
Everyone here is taking crazy amounts of mescaline and I'm just over here like hey have you tried the pretzel rolls mmm
New discovery: your vibrator works on my balls. Technology is wonderful I love the future
Crying while listening to Miley Cyrus. BE GLAD YOU JUMPED THIS SINKING SHIP!
Idk man there's lots of bad dick but even a bad cookie is still pretty good
Oh, and Harry Potter. We could be fuck-and-Harry-Potter buddies.
Randomize
