some 7 year old just told me his favorite rapper was eminem and kim got what she deserved...god damn today's youth is in a dark period
I've done 29 out of the 30 things to do to a naked man according to Cosmo. I don't know if that makes me innovative or slutty.
Genius.
scratch lunch, i just found about 7 more dicks drawn on my back
i just remembered last night waiting for you to pick me up wearing my bra on my head to protect me from the rain
She told me that as long as she kept starring at the freckle on her arm she wouldnt throw up
She actually pushed her roomie out of the way and said 'You already fucked him it's my turn!'
Those were the days I had no morals... Dark times.
Shall we take a trip back?
watched two friends get underages. one had a shirt on that said lets get wasted while the other said to the cop "i understand your just trying to do your job but that was dirty bro".
Every pair of shorts I try on makes me look like some kind of powerful lesbian wizard.
That is like, the point of shorts
Just found my socks folded and in the back pocket of my jeans. Apparently drunk me refuses to lose shit after the panties incident over New Years.
Running errands with mom, cool. Coming to pleasures with mom for her valentines night, not ever in a million years cool.
Ugh he's so pretty though. He bit my face at the bar because I tried to steal his ID and I forgave him
I'm on the porch day drinking and the neighbor is in his yard screaming about his amazing sandwiches, maybe we should move.
I appreciate having someone to objectively critique my dick pics.
Oh shit. My bra is undone and I'm pretty sure I peed on my sandal
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