if your dad confronts the dude you fucked about the background check he did on him, NOT GONNA GET A CALL BACK
are you wasted or are you getting laid?
ebdebdebdebd
wow
he whispered in my ear that he would be upstairs and i should come up. i stayed downstairs. he came back down and repeated to whisper in my ear. this happened about 5 times until he passed out.
I don't care if he is my ex... I have the deed to his dick until someone else fucks him. We broke up 2 years ago.... I am still holding that deed!
Cuz its complicated and I hate complicated and I miss your penis
i think dick pics are a sign of a sexual renaissance
I like to get drunk just like anyone else but not to the point of sticking a rubber tube up my asshole
Is cereal technically a soup?
Fuck, I'm high.
I'm going to take a nap so I don't feel like a stripper sneezed in my mouth tomorrow morning at work.
You tried to bite my nipple like 3 times
NAh son
Just general bites
It could happen. I haven't creeped the rest of the guest list yet.
Just creeped. Everyone is a passable 7. Orgy is a go!
Fyi, shaking your genitals at me doesn't count as "trying to have sex".
I honestly didn't think living in Canada would change me, until I found myself watching hockey porn
She just kept feeding people pretzels and sayying "You're such a good goldfish."
I dropped my pants and she just stared until she asked how is that even possible? Best night ever lmao
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