I'm scared. I feel like she's my mom and she just walked in on me having sex. Like she's "disappointed"
I need a secretary to manage my drinking schedule.
Nothing says true friendship like 2 people bonding over potentially having AIDS.
When are you comin back?
probably mid next week, depending on when i finish my remaining half gallons
just tried googling 24 hr taco bell and when i typed "24 hour" it autocompleted with fitness. buzzzz killllll
can we get vodka so I have an excuse for being an emotional wreck
The usual, im laying out. Ipod on shuffle, Large spray bottle to cool myself of and a smaller one filled with chilled vodka. I can spray the vodka right in my mouth without even opening my eyes. THIS IS LIVING....
Kid got laid mid-party wearin a fuzzy hat with ears and 40's taped to his bear paws... wtf
BoomCity!!!
You don't have to text me that every time you have sex. I already heard you ring the gong.
No no no he wouldn't talk to me before I showed his best friend how good I am at twerking
Well we went from the roof to the stairwell to an air mattres. One day were going to fuck in a bed
Just used the handle end of a spatula to get the baggie of coke wedged between my passenger seat. Innovation points?
Those nachos came to me in a dream
I tried to take a cute nude but sneezed halfway through. I sent it anyway
How did people get blow jobs before text messaging?
Randomize
