Nick had a break down & said to me "Everybody's mad at me, I'm the douchebag, Im the fucking douchebag that everyone hates, Do you wanna come home with this douchebag?!"
You're going home with him aren't you?
I'll see ya in the morning when I leave his house
She made a list of the things each of us had done wrong and assigned a point system. Guess who came out the loser?
You kept yelling that her vagina looked like a hatchet wound.
I like to think of it as a lesbian feast.
I'm sorry I make you whore yourself out to him everytime I'm drunk and want mcdonalds.
I got stoned in my snow covered car and pretended I was burried alive
You know it's a good party when even the dealers were too fucked up. Just found and counted 140 E pills I found in a bag in the couch. Just paid for weed this month.
Yea we had fun. Lost my wallet some girl has it. Sarah fell asleep in a cab and ended up at some wawa. It was cray. She's home now
"I made out with someone too, but then he tried to fuck and I played dead"
He didn't call me beautiful but he came in less than five minutes so same thing, right?
You can't just walk around stealing hats from drunk boys and peeing in bathtubs. Turn down.
Hooked up with a straight guy while dressed as a man. I'm unstoppable.
I'm slowly getting to where I don't hate people anymore.
Never mind. Some random dude just walked past me and asked if I was having fun. I snarled at him. I might still kinda hate people.
Dude we need to hang out soon. I'm in the mood to get arrested again.
I vaguely remember ordering a water at some point last night. It's good to know drunk me can still be responsible.
Randomize