I was staring at you from my window across the quad. I wanted to let you know so it's not creepy
we are all sexual creatures
yea maybe. but you're not. you're not getting any.
can't believe I ate straight coffee grounds to stay awake for that
Um, I don't really remember much about the event... and then I woke up on the metro..
So Ive been fucking her for the past couple months and i just found our that my grandfather and her grandmother were fuck buddies for a while. I feel like this is a new awesome family tradition that skips a generation.
I have a question, if it paid really well, like ridiculously well, would you be a restaraunts under the table resident blowjob girl?
You told him you loved him!?
I mean if he translated "Zi luve ku" as that then yes.
I'll probably regret it tomorrow. But right now, accepting this $2000 credit card so that I can finance booty calls from across the united states sounds like a golden idea.
I feel like every picture I upload of him on facebook where you can see his purity ring, I should make the caption "something in this picture does not belong"
The condom broke. Its OK tho, turns out I was just humping her thigh for 20 minutes. Jager dude, Jager.
Its not chugging if its just one gulp
PS I almost downloaded grindr to see if any guys wanted to buy me chinese food..
He gave me an orgasim so fantastic that I had an asthma attack.
Well, I sent nudes with an Elmo t shirt on the floor... so there's that.
The salt made it so good this margarita is touching my soul. I swear I'm not high BUT I want elote in a cup with the insides of a shrimp taco. I think that would make my life complete.
Randomize
