Can't remember why I called but it definitely had something to do with Lou Bega
im starting to measure my showers by the number of beers i drink while im in there.
There is no point in being painfully greyhound thin if you are then going to dress like it's raining in 1992.
Just watched a porn with the dvd commentary on i think i need to re-evaluate my life
Hangover Status: I've been bedridden longer than that kid from The Secret Garden. It's not looking good.
#1- I went to button my shirt only to find they were all mising. #2- I'm so fu@king sore I feel like I was sweating to the oldies all night. #3- this pounding headache I have, I blame solely on Jennifer. Everyone sounds like Billy Mays when they talk. I remember nothing from last night, I'm concerned.
Jameson and I invented street rugby last night. Yeah
He told me I was the only person he wanted to fuck in his rental mini van. Thats so romantic for a fuck buddy relationship.
Decided in my tanked state last night purchase 2 weeks worth of xanax, so I can guess my way thru this week and finals. Soberly, I decided it would be a great way to test my knowledge of finance.
I just think his face would be more attractiveif it was framed by my thighs
Last night I flashed a car full of people my tits for a bag of pretzels so yeah I'd say I was at least tipsy.
He has great taste in girls. I feel closer to my Eskimo sisters than my real sister...
Nothing warms my heart more than the sight of a naked hockey player in my bed.
I've never wanted anyone to have herpes as I much as I want him to right now.
if you're not jumping for joy when you see penis then you're looking at the wrong ones.
Randomize