...i apologize for hitting you up so much tonight im just kinda in a little pickle. im going to sleep in my car near u so pretty plz lmk if you head home...
Yeah, i don't remember peeing. or meeting the girl.
Blew in her face. She is Pissed. Yahtzee. As she brushes her teeth.
She's not depressed. She's just sober. It's like the same thing.
Just tried to tap morse code on the wall seperating our beds to tell you I was awake and ready to smoke
Not even drunk me wanted to have sex with him. I kept intentionally hitting my head on the table behind me during sex till he said i was too drunk for sex.
Welp, she's chewing our paper towels again. She's like an obnoxiously hot puppy
I just realized that my phone was set to Brazilian time...what the fuck happened last night
its coolsest when we hear the beat in our water bottles. and the likghts are in his eyes now. oh holland
he doesn't even text me anymore.. he just facebook chats me a shark emoticon which has turned into code for 'be naked at my house in 15 mins'
Obviously he considers you not fucking him as fucking up. Thus making him fuck up. Based on this I believe he should be disqualified from the race to your vagina.
He ripped off my pantyhose and all I could think was, "oh no those were clinic-appropriate!" That's what I get for ditching a continuing education meeting to go hook up with my scuba instructor.
It's 3 in the morning and there is a bird chirping it's head off outside. GOD DAMNIT THIS IS NOT A TIME TO SING OF YOUR CHEERFUL BIRD MERRIMENT YOU STUPID BIRD CUNT!
I don't know why I bit your face last night but I'm sorry .
I think I'm taking after my dog, I just want to hump everything
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