This is the first month I have not taken plan B to get my period in over a year
And somehow that makes me sad knowing I haven't had raunchy unprotected sex in a month
Ive either hit rock bottom or become my own hero.
No - a douche bag is not a fashion accessory. They do not make Gucci Douchebags
haha you were so trashed that you deleted all of your christian music from itunes and kept saying"c-ya God, nice knowin ya"
I hope so. I just start to question my lifestyle when i pee on coffee tables
Wednesday. Otherwise known, to you at least, as "there are two gay men in my bed" day.
We made the bar tender tell us how he proposed to his girlfriend. In detail. While we made gushing noises. We are embarrassments to females everywhere
I'm getting flash backs of last night. They're coming in song form.
That dog was the best thing i ever touched
For every drunk face picture you send me, I'm gonna send a wholesome family photo.
I've been here 11 months and i just realized i have literally never looked at my apartment/roomates sober
My mom just busted me rolling a blunt on her bathroom counter. ...all she said was fuck it it's Christmas
Girl just left one of the apts upstairs carrying a giant bottle of kahlula and a lunchable.... I feel like we could be friends
He just fucked me into paralysis. can't feel my hands or face.
How do I tell my boss I have slutty fantasies about him, me and his conference room table?
Randomize
