Katie is reenacting me jizzing in her eye via emoticons...
my boyfriend just told me he used to have genital herpes. I was gonna have sex with him, but now it's SOOO over.
what kind of stupid fuck tells you that BEFORE sex? he is definitely not a keeper.
She jerked me off while she drove us back from Denver going 70mph. It was both the scariest and most erotic moment of my life.
What baked good do you think says thanks for being a great tutor, lets bang?
we are currently watching a singalong porn...just thought you should know
It's a bathroom floor kind of morning.
When's a good time to tell your boyfriend you've slept with his ex girlfriend?
perfect irony that i'm celebrating international women's day with a yeast infection
You told me my blanket felt like ground beef.
First of all you're supposed to say "you're not fat". And second of all never ever deprive me of nachos.
A big dick and how quickly they respond to snapchat is all I look for in a guy
Last thing I remember is ranting about hating pants. Woke up this morning pants less. Couldn't find them, decided to leave. Driving without pants is surprisingly liberating.
I was giving him a handjob in the woods and a family walked by
A boy in some branch of the military kissed me I think I'm going through an American sniper phase
All I'm saying is there better be a bow on your dick for my birthday
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