farters have to be the big spoon...
We just saw a waitress walk by with a tray of bacardi and whipped cream.
Whoever ordered that deserves a pat on the back and the "classiest customer" award
she keeps The Day After Pill in her bra... there is a God.
We had sex in the ocean but the tide took our clothes away too. Its no fun walking back to the dorm wearing only a beach blanket between you.
It went from "haha, this will be funny" to "full blown anime porn fetish"
If I start taking birth control 8 days after we had sex do you think it'll stop the baby from being made?
I fell asleep at the bar. And the bouncer threw a snowball at my face.
I would not be 19 again if you paid me. Guess who found naked pictures of themselves? Fuck cocaine
Yeah bro I don't know how she's gonna explain the black eye, how else do you tell your boss "my knee hit me in the face during sex last night"
I said you have to fuck the german guy and take one for the team...it's a once in a lifetime opportunity you know.
Just had sex in an ice hut. What have you done with your holiday break?
True freedom is running around a sex club in former power plant in Berlin wearing a boots, a jock
OK BUT WHO THE FUCK FORGTS A LIVE CHICKEN IN MY HOUSE
Not all of us can be into hot dads. Some of us have to have commitment issues and be into musicians.
may or may not have snorted a line of tums... wtf.
Randomize
