Want to have sex later?
This feels like a trap
He's still on the phone with him. This is unnatural. Dudes don't call other dudes just to talk.
I need to stop hooking up with boys in my major. three boys in one class is just a litttle too awkward.
I'm talking like I woke up and her bra was spinning around caught on my ceiling fan
yeah, its right past the deli mart where i showed my right tit for mozzarella sticks.
Is my lip ring still in your hair?
Thanks, girl! That means a lot. I can't wait to share my jail stories with you over salad and cupcakes.
Boobs have been pretty central in my life somehow lately which makes me question if I am truly gay
I now have a other guy willing to drive 3 hours for my vagina. At my next gyno appointment I'm asking her if there's cocaine in there.
Ok, in complete transparency, I am eating a cookie on my bed naked while reading a Halo novel.
The girl I was Skype sexing just asked for a moment of silence for robin Williams.
He stopped in the middle of us banging in order to check in for his Southwest flight.
I agree and I would be an awesome dog
I've reached the last of the wine in my cup so now I have to sit up in my bed to get it through the crazy straw
It's technically 2016 but since I haven't gone to bed I'm still counting it as 2015, so I'm gonna drink all the alcohol in my house so tomorrow I can become the better version of myself that I'll be for 5 minutes.
Randomize
