Why must guys tell girls who are a little bigger that "they like a girl with meat on her bones?" Yeah needless to say he went home alone
So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
Its officially tradition: I black out every year on michael jackson's death day..
So after I pop out this baby we need to just go on a monthlong coke binge so I can get skinny again before vegas
Just violated the laws of fuck-buddyship and talked to him about my personal life. I don't like it.
Its official. 'Jingle Bell Rock' gives me a boner. Thank you Lindsay Lohan & Rachel McAdams.
Just heard my neighbor say "I'm just gonna lay down in a coma until someone comes into my room and hands me a beer." He's got his priorities straight
It's one of those nights that you wish to god someone would booty call you, and then realize you'll just be stuck here with your poptart...
I need to establish a pattern of dominance early.... I'm like a slutty Cesar Milan
I just want it to be said that I had sex in my Belle dress last night. Classy motherfucker.
It's Christmas, you should know what a virgin is.
It's funny because every time I go up and down the stairs it's an adventure. A A DRUNK ADVENTURE. PS I ALREADY THREW UP WTF
I'm not in the business of asking people about their lizard
I meant his actual lizard not his manhood
You should have thought of that before emitting walrus sounds while intoxicated
Sadly my Summer of Cocks is coming to an end
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