PS the last 3 guys I've hooked up with were a CEO, a mechanical bull operator and a magic the gathering player...I need a type...
Ur type is ready and willing
..Thats also how I think I got the lyrics from MIAs Paper Planes Sharpeed on my ass? Maybe.
Just saw the pics you left in my phone. thanks for reminding me that last night was not a dream.
good thing vaginas are great cup holders
hey got me stoned for the first time when i was 14. there is no bond stronger
Its Friday night, and I'm sitting at home watching are you smarter then a 5th grader, drinking vodka. I got every single question wrong. Clearly you see where I'm headed in life.
Man the liquor store just wrong numbered me, its a sign even god wants me to drink
... thanks for letting me perform minor surgery on myself last night.
I figured if you were smart enough to sterilize with vodka, you could handle it.
I'm still tasting pancake mix. I think this may actually be a serious medical problem...
YOU'RE CHANGING THE SUBJECT. I CAN BLOW SOMETHING UP OR I CAN TELL HIM YOU LOVE HIM, BUT ONE OF THE TWO IS BOUND TO HAPPEN
Oh I know babe. You're shining beacon of adult responsibility. That's why I go down on you.
I go down on you because abs
I may or may not have just let Ash Ketchum capture my wild Pikachu in a parking lot.
A million fucking miles away, and the sun still manages to fuck my hungover mornings up.
I've never had someone have to dis-arm themselves before I sucked their dick prior to that
I did crash a prom last night though.. It was fun
Randomize
