the last 2 times weve had drunk sex ive had to get the morning after pill.. he's turning into a real expensive fuck buddy.
He asked if he could fuck me while on chat roulette.
Valium party in the driveway. Attendance: 1. Don't make me do this alone.
I just got kidnapped by the rugby team for a scavenger hunt. I'm "the girl you had sex with last night"
You sucked on the drag queens heel. It got that rough.
I'm trying on my bridesmaid dress so that I can determine what will need to be done to achieve getting fucked while wearing it.
there are teeth marks in the soap. why are there teeth marks in the soap.
You can cross "give someone a blow job while playing Colors of the Wind" off my bucket list.
If I die tonight and was cremated, you could probably get high off the smoke.
She looks like she smells of sausage, sunblock and sorrow.
He is currently in a meeting and I am sexting him in Italian
And he's using Google translate to reply. Who says cross country relationships can't be fun?
You made me drive your car so you could give the dude from the parking lot a BJ in the back seat. Classy.
Got hit on by the cable guy. Solid 9. Think Orlando Bloom with a glorious curly mullet.
Just found a rebirth in peppermint schnapps. May be able to stay up all night and finish this paper after all. MERRY CHRISTMAS
Anyone who does not know who Paul McCartney is does NOT get to put hands in my pants
Randomize
