I least I know I can't get pregnant because it's on my hair
I just remembered we were doing butt clenching exercising with bar straws last night
You now know someone who has just successfully talked his way out of being arrested for breaking into the town library at midnight. Ive been home for too long.
I can trace it back to that drunken night where we peed on each other in the shower.
I just had a brazillian performed by a hungarian named olga. Im pretty sure she was trying to rip out my soul. You owe me a million orgasms
I wish! That ended in 2001 when we all got collectively band from the Settle Inn. As a group we are also band from social events at the zoo. It's impressive really.
he made a bon jovi sex playlist and started crying when "i'll be there" came on... how was your night?
In sex ed. they really need to include a lesson on saying tampon in foreign languages, just in case.... Trying to ask the woman at the reception desk, who barely speaks English, for one just turned into an awkward game of charades.
So lets not base feelings on vagina tingles
I was 100% done.. I used my vibrator while eating cold pizza. Shit was magical.
Remember when I puked into a mesh garbage can in the middle of a meeting and told the clients it was "morning sickness"?
hahah yep
Well the are flying back here, it's been like 10 months, should I frame fake baby pics in my office?? Or too much?
when you shit yourself on the way to school its time to give up and go home
Don't get yourself off tomorrow. We. Are. Having. Sex. That's that. Just dont do it.
I'm drinking because I just started here and every single person I work with wants to quit and when I asked a coworker how she's doing she literally just started crying.
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
Randomize
